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Listening to Yourself

In this article, we will explore what life feels like being free from voices that are holding you back from emotional freedom to be your true self. A child’s individuality is mostly seen as a threatening factor to emotionally immature parents because it triggers a fear of possible rejections or fear of abandonment. This fear stems from parents feeling that if their child thinks independently, them as parents will be rejected and not needed. Emotionally immature parents see their family as characters that they can predict rather than who they really are. When children present genuine emotions, parents feel that the interaction is unpredictable and might not react well. This causes children to suppress their authentic emotions, thoughts, and needs in order to prevent their parents from becoming anxious. Most of the times, parents who needs to stay in control will teach their children how to think, feel and behave. Therefore, it leaves not much room for children to learn and discover who they really are. With all these, children learn about life and themselves through the voices of their parents. They internalise what they are being taught as their own. Over time, these commentaries may seem like it is coming from within and it belongs to you, but it actually it is the voice of your parents. Some of the voices from parents may be coming from a good place and seems supportive, but unfortunately, many will hear criticisms, anger, and disappointment. It is very important that we start questioning these voices when we hear them. Ask yourself “whose voices are you hearing, about yourself?”, if they belong to your parents and comes with doubts on your own self-worth, then it is time that you evaluate them and ask yourself if that is your true self. The goal is to recognise and revaluate the voices that doesn’t belong to your true self. By doing so, you will begin to free yourself from their undue influence.


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